Monday, December 26, 2011

Sorry, Sir :'(



Dear Sir,
No one knows how badly I want to be a part of this programme. This music class is gradually taking me to the levels I have been wanting to reach. Sir, you are God to me. I feel blessed being taught by you. Being trained for a programme by you is such an honour. Refusing to be a part of such a programme feels like a sin. I really did not want to sin. I am still craving to be a part of this programme in which your talented group of students is going to perform. When your students, my music class mates, used to tell me that I gave a good performance in class, I never believed them. I just took it as a good gesture by them. But when you said that I have potential, I was touched. I began to believe in my musical self. Having you as my Guru is one of the best things that has happened to me in my life so far. Time spent listening to you feels like time spent in heaven. You have helped me dig out hidden skills in me.

Yesterday, you asked me why I am not taking part in this programme. Sir, it is not because of anything that anyone might be guessing. It's my family. My traditional, boring, conservative, typical orthodox Indian family. Being out on 31st night, for them, is a disrespectful, shameful and dangerous act. They will not let me stay out of home 'alone' that day because it is not right. What will people think? Where was I till midnight? Partying is such a disrespectful thing to do! They will not come along with me for the show because driving back home will be unsafe since it's a night of drunken driving, accidents, arrests etc. 31st night is sensational and it is best to stay put at home like we have been doing all these years. This 31st night is going to be my saddest new year's night. I will be at home, wishing that I weren't.

You told me yesterday that I should come out of my shell. When you asked me why I wasn't taking part, it took me a lot of effort to stop those tears at the back of my eyes. I had nothing to say. How could I tell you there that it's my family that doesn't want me to be a part of this. I am sorry for letting you and everyone else down. Its a sin to make people request a new comer like me to be a part of the show and me turning them down. I am not big enough for it. Anyday but 31st, I have been told by my family. You will not understand them. I still haven't.

I am sorry. Genuinely sorry :'(


10 comments:

♪♪Happy Go Lucky♪♪ said...

:'(

*speechless*

Sanket Kambli said...

that sounded depressing..

don't have anything to say to cheer you up..

nitin said...

We cant blame anyone here shru..Your Parents are also right in some ways...Please do not get disheartened by this...This event will come and go..Your beautiful voice is what we all love and you will surely be a part of us soon in the republic day event on jan 26th...So just wipe those tears and Iam sure our guru will understand you ..:)

Vrij said...

Get engaged. And ask Him to take you there ;)

Shruti said...

Harini: yeah.. :(

Sankoo: no one had.. and I dint cheer up either

Nitin: :( Thanks buddy, but it hurts. Yes, our wonderful Guru understood. Am glad I got a chance to tell him directly, despite late.

Vrij: What if he is one of those kinds too? Why do u think marriage terrifies me, Vrij?

Jack said...

Shruti,

I am sorry to learn this. A time comes when parents need to understand aspirations of children and be support to them unless it is something unlawful. I am sure they will see reasoning if spoken to logically. If you feel, please do contact me. My id is in my profile.

Take care

Jules said...

Makes me so sad!!! To be held back from reaching one's potential is the sin here. Traditionalism should come with one or two exceptions.

Anonymous said...

shru,
when will you ever learn that your life is for YOU to live and not for someone else to control?

Live it to your best since while there is a chance for the reincarnation thingy to be true, there is an even bigger chance that this might be your one and only shot.

...

Live and follow your heart you dummy!!

Be HAPPY!



- h

Shruti said...

Jack: uh.. what will u do? talk to them!? They do support me, but, conditions apply :/

Jules: U said it!

Anon: yo H! :P Yea yea.. that's all easy to say. Anyway, for as long as I can, I'll follow my heart.

Jack said...

Shruti,

No, I will not talk to them but may be able to understand situation in better way and suggest ways to achieve what you wish to.

Take care