No one knows how badly I want to be a part of this programme. This music class is gradually taking me to the levels I have been wanting to reach. Sir, you are God to me. I feel blessed being taught by you. Being trained for a programme by you is such an honour. Refusing to be a part of such a programme feels like a sin. I really did not want to sin. I am still craving to be a part of this programme in which your talented group of students is going to perform. When your students, my music class mates, used to tell me that I gave a good performance in class, I never believed them. I just took it as a good gesture by them. But when you said that I have potential, I was touched. I began to believe in my musical self. Having you as my Guru is one of the best things that has happened to me in my life so far. Time spent listening to you feels like time spent in heaven. You have helped me dig out hidden skills in me.
Yesterday, you asked me why I am not taking part in this programme. Sir, it is not because of anything that anyone might be guessing. It's my family. My traditional, boring, conservative, typical orthodox Indian family. Being out on 31st night, for them, is a disrespectful, shameful and dangerous act. They will not let me stay out of home 'alone' that day because it is not right. What will people think? Where was I till midnight? Partying is such a disrespectful thing to do! They will not come along with me for the show because driving back home will be unsafe since it's a night of drunken driving, accidents, arrests etc. 31st night is sensational and it is best to stay put at home like we have been doing all these years. This 31st night is going to be my saddest new year's night. I will be at home, wishing that I weren't.
You told me yesterday that I should come out of my shell. When you asked me why I wasn't taking part, it took me a lot of effort to stop those tears at the back of my eyes. I had nothing to say. How could I tell you there that it's my family that doesn't want me to be a part of this. I am sorry for letting you and everyone else down. Its a sin to make people request a new comer like me to be a part of the show and me turning them down. I am not big enough for it. Anyday but 31st, I have been told by my family. You will not understand them. I still haven't.
I am sorry. Genuinely sorry :'(